Scottie's Near Post Corner – The Premiership 2010/11

 Below is exactly how the Prem Top 6 will look come the final reckoning in May. No arguments. This is fact. Put your house on it. Probably…..

1st - Chelski : The city of Liverpool breathe a sigh of relief as Utd fail overtake their precious title tally (which was mostly won when footballers were shite and half pissed at kick off). Naturally, Ancelotti is sacked, despite winning the FA Cup too.

2nd - ManUre : Blunder their way to second again. Only faint traces of Rooney remain after he disappears up his own balloon knot. Ferguson finally retires, but doesn’t tell the BBC because he’s still a sulky twat.

3rd – The Arse : Wenger’s promise of finishing higher than last season falls flat on it’s arse as the Gunners continue to play exactly the same way as they always do. Ravaged by injuries to their tissue-paper players, they stumble their way to third in the Prem. But they do win the Champions League along the way…

4th – Liverpool : Woy commands his troops back into the top four by boring the opposition to death with defensive tactics and brain-numbing draws. Towwes manages a record-breaking 15 appearances in between injuries and Gewward is accused of smiling, which he subsequently denied.

5th – Citeh : Despite buying every single footballer that no-one else wanted, Citeh still don’t crack the top four. As the season ends, 337 Citeh strikers hand in their transfer requests.

6th – Spuds : Another ‘fantastic for the boys’ season under Harry Redknapp, although he misses most of it after finally being caught & jailed for dodgy dealings over a twenty-five year period. Still gets Manager-of-the-Year Award though, because there’s no-one else English to give it to. Except Woy.

This is the truth. Honest guv.

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Nicola Hart – WAG of the week

This week we feature Mrs Jamie Carragher – Nicola Hart.
JC’s childhood sweetheart, married in 2005 and have 2 children together.

Having spent a good 3 minutes searching the web for juicing gossip, and plenty of information about Nicola, we well and truly drew a blank.
Looks to us that she isn’t a party goer, has no job and probably spends her time at Carragher Towers bringing up their two kids – Sorry to disappoint you all, anyway, here’s her mush -

Nicola Hart Carragher

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Alex Ferguson should replace Owen Hargreaves

Alex Ferguson should replace Owen Hargreaves

Owen Hargreaves has shown himself to be a talented footballer throughout his career and in the few appearances he has made for Manchester United, but at a price of around £17 million he has found himself to be anything but value for money after turning out for the Premier League side just 26 times since his arrival back in 2007.

Although the Glazer family have suggested they are more than happy to continue to bankroll Sir Alex Ferguson in the transfer market, the manager is yet to find a replacement for Hargreaves.

Although his loyalty to the player is admirable, it still appears like a crazy decision not to replace a player who is constantly crocked. Despite the fact that United have Carrick, Anderson and Fletcher as players who are capable of playing in the holding role that Hargreaves occupies, none of them appear able to make the role their own. The Manchester United betting suggests they are still in with a great chance of winning the title this season, but they can’t expect to dominate games without having a top-class holding midfielder.

Should Hargreaves continue to remain in a permanent state of injury, something Ferguson clearly feels is unlikely considering his decision to include him in his 25-man Premier League squad, then Sir Alex may be left ruing his decision not to find a replacement for a man he had hoped would be a key part of his squad.

Meanwhile, United travel Everton this weekend and the Everton betting suggests the home side, who have struggled to score so far this season, could be in for a very tough time.

With things still going relatively well on the pitch, United fans may be forgiven for putting any fears they may have about their squad to the backs of their mind as they look to regain the status of Premier League champions from their rivals Chelsea.

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Champions League groups decided

Champions League groups decided

The draw for the group stages of the Champions League has been made and it’s a mixed bag for the Premier League teams competing in the competition.

However, all four English sides will be confident of progressing and this is backed up in the Champions League odds.

Manchester United will face a battle of Britain when they take on Glasgow Rangers in what is sure to be two exciting matches.

United have made two of the previous three finals in the Champions League and Sir Alex Ferguson will be looking for his third Champions League trophy this season.

As well as Rangers, United will face a tough couple of games against Spanish side Valencia. Ferguson’s team will also face the unknown prospect of Turkish champions Bursaspor, who will be making their Champions League debut.

Chelsea face a tricky but winnable group after being drawn against Marseille, Spartak Moscow and Slovenian side MSK Zilina. Marseille were crowned Ligue 1 champions at the end of last season. Spartak are the other strong team in the group as they finished second in the Russian Premier League. MSK Zilina will be another unknown quantity in the tournament but Chelsea won’t be worrying too much about qualifying from the group.

Arsenal have been handed the kindest draw out of their rivals as Braga, FK Partizan and Shakhtar Donetsk are all winnable matches for Arsene Wenger and his team. The draw will mean a return to the Emirates for Shakhtar’s new striker Eduardo who was signed from Arsenal earlier in the summer.

Spurs have been given no favours in what will be their first experience of the tournament. They have been put in possibly the hardest group of them all. Inter Milan, Werder Bremen and FC Twente will all provide tough tests for Harry Redknapp and his team.

Meanwhile, Liverpool and Manchester City – who are amongst the favourites in the Europa League odds – have been handed tricky groups in Friday’s draw. The Reds will face Steaua Bucharest, Napoli and Utrecht whilst City will come up against Juventus, Salzburg and Lech Poznan.

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Irina Shayk WAG of the Week

Irina Shayk is the current WAG of £80m footballer Cristiano Ronaldo, she is also a Russian fashion model known for her appearances in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue beginning in 2007 and as the face of lingerie brand Intimissimi.

However, Irina, who has been dating the Winker since early 2010, made a “shock confession” in an interview by admitting that despite her superstar boyfriend being a world-famous footballer, she’s not actually a fan of football.
While Irina wouldn’t discuss her relationship with the 25-year-old footballer, she laughed: ‘I’m not a fan of soccer, for sure not.’

Well, we are a fan of you “for sure”….

Irina Shayk

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How exactly can we improve Premier League financing?

How exactly can we improve Premier League financing?

MoneyIn recent years, one phrase has emerged to become a buzzword for English Premier League betting pundits: ‘big spenders’. Yet, with new UEFA financing rules that determine eligibility to take part in European competitions soon to take effect, and with teams aware that the recession has seen a huge drop in demand for season tickets at the majority of clubs, could we finally be on the cusp of seeing the best league in the world also become the best run?

Take for example a new initiative by the Arsenal Supporters Trust. Instead of taking part in marches, sniping from the sidelines, or waving Norwich City scarves instead of their own team’s colours, Gunners fans have worked with the board (including members of which the fanbase is hostile to) in order to implement a new scheme that they hope will eventually see Arsenal fans having a real say in how the football club is run.

This new scheme sees Arsenal fans being able to acquire ‘fanshares’, 100 of which account for a share in Arsenal Football Club. With Arsenal shares trading for anything up to £10,000, the £100 required to buy a fanshare (which are then clubbed together by the supporters’ trust to create whole shares) means that fans can make as big, or as little, a contribution as they like, opening up the running of the club to all fans regardless of wealth.

Whilst it is in its early days, the scheme has attracted praise from the Premier League, UEFA, those who analyse football odds and the current UK government to name but a few. Should this scheme prove to be successful, we may well see it utilised by clubs across the country, helping
to bring the best league in the world closer to its fans.

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Imogen Thomas WAG of the Week

Imogen Thomas WAG of the Week

The 2003 Miss Wales winner shot to fame in 2006 when she graced British TV screens by appearing in Big Brother.
Taking the now conventional route from reality TV to general celebrity, Imogen was a regular on the London nightclub scene after her TV appearance and presumably bumped into Jermaine Defoe one night.

Punch her name into a Google Images search and find two brilliant reasons why she caught the wandering eye of Mr Defoe.

Imogen Thomas

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Blackburn go with youth

Blackburn go with youth

Blackburn manager Sam Allardyce has made it clear he will be focusing on bringing youth players through this season.

The Lancashire club have an abundance of talent coming through their ranks at Ewood Park and, added to the seasoned pros at the club, they could help the side overachieve this term.

Despite have one of the lowest transfer budgets in the Premier League, Allardyce’s side finished in the top half of the table last campaign. Some people made Blackburn betting tips for relegation this season, but they proved they are no pushovers when beating Everton last weekend.

This season will see a similar squad to last season with the only change so far being in the striking department. Young Argentinean Franco Di Santo has gone back to Chelsea and promising striker Mame Diouf has been brought in from Manchester United on a season-long loan. Diouf is highly thought of at Old Trafford and will be a good bet to score more than Di Santo’s one league goal during his time at the club.

Perhaps the hottest prospect at Blackburn is English centre-half Phil Jones. The defender’s performances last season caught the eye of some of the Premier League big boys – Arsenal, Manchester City, Chelsea and Spurs were all reported to have sent scouts to watch the 18-year-old. 21-year-old French midfielder Steven N’Zonzi was brought to the club for less than £1 million last summer and went to win the club’s Player of the Year award after a brilliant first season in England. There are other exciting prospects at the club in the shape of Swedish left-back Martin Olsson and Canadian forward David Hoilett who recently put pen to paper on a new two-and-a-half-year contract.

Croatian striker Niko Kalinic is expected to improve on his poor form in the last campaign, when he only scored twice. The 22-year-old has started this season well, scoring in the first league game of the season against Everton. Much is expected of the talented forward who has shown glimpses of real quality since arriving from Hajduk Spit at the beginning of last season. Of course, the Andy Gray betting tips won’t give him a chance of being top scorer, but if he can bag ten goals that would be a very useful return.

The experienced players at the club will be integral to Blackburn’s success this season. Captain Ryan Nelson has been one of the most consistent centre-backs in the Premier League over the last five seasons. He will be ably assisted by fellow senior players Paul Robinson, David Dunn, Michel Salgado and Brett Emerton who all have bundles of experience in the top flight. With both the talented youngsters and experienced players in the side, Blackburn will prove a very awkward opponent this season.

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Retirements highlight poor Capello communication

Retirements highlight poor Capello communication

England EmblemIt has been a strange few days for Fabio Capello and the England football team. At a time when their horrific World Cup is still fresh in the memory, they have been hit with a couple of bizarre retirements from players set to be involved in this week’s friendly with Hungary.

Both Paul Robinson and Wes Brown were selected in Capello’s first squad since the World Cup and both have since withdrawn from the game and retired from international football.

This is a very embarrassing situation for Capello and shows that he perhaps doesn’t communicate fully with his fringe players. Surely he should have spoken to each player about their mindset following such a disastrous tournament?

The next couple of England fixtures are crucial as the team looks to repair the damage done in South Africa, with enthusiasm and belief from the fans arguably at an all time low.

So, when calling on Robinson, who hasn’t played for his country since 2007, surely Capello should have had a conversation with him about how he felt as regards to a return to the England fold?

From the outside, and probably from Robinson’s point of view, it looks as if Capello has dismissed Robert Green because of his error against USA and thought “hmmm, who else is there to make up the numbers? Ah yes, Robinson”.

Speaking to the Blackburn keeper would not only have saved a bit of embarrassment on the part of Capello and the FA, but it may also have convinced Robinson to give England another go. As it is, the keeper has decided to focus on club duties and he’ll be needed as the Blackburn betting odds suggest they’ll have a tough season.

The Brown situation is similar. Injury played a part in him missing the World Cup and he has always struggled to make an impact for his country because of fitness, so again, was it ideal that he was selected after such little football of late?

The Manchester United man clearly wants to focus on club matters and this is something Capello should have known. Yes, you could argue that everyone should be available to their country, but this was such an important squad announcement for England. The Betfair football tips suggest they will win easily, but the biggest issue was team-spirit.

It should have been a fresh start with a few new faces and now it is being overshadowed by Capello’s lack of understanding when it comes to the players he is selecting.

Neither Robinson or Brown were the most inspiring selections and you wouldn’t bet on them being involved in Euro 2012 anyway, but it is worrying that the players themselves have to rule themselves out rather than the manager assessing the situation more thoroughly.

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What happened to England players after the 2010 World Cup

England’s World Cup Flops enjoy rest of the Summer

Miserable England Fan A month or so after collapsing out of the World Cup and branded a bunch of flops, Predict Football takes a look at what the starting 11 England players have been doing over the short summer since flying back from South Africa with their tails between their tired little legs.

David James

Thrown into the first 11 after Rob Green’s howler in the opening game, the 40 year old keeper left Portsmouth to join Championship Bristol City. “There’s a bit of banter flying already – they’re not too happy about the hair style but there you go,” joked Calamity.

Glen Johnson
The right back who cost Liverpool a reported £18.5m has remained at Anfield, amongst the rumours of top players leaving the club. Having been joined again by ex-West Ham, and ex-Chelsea team mate Joe Cole, he’ll probably one of the few players who may feature in another World Cup for his country.

John Terry
Allegedly attempted to divide the players at South Africa, rumours of a huge falling out with captain Steven Gerrard, Terry looked very average with Rio Ferdinand beside him. After a season of personal disasters and rumours that he’s leaving Chelsea, surely he’ll want a quiet season concentrating on his on field performances.

Matt Upson
Scored the “first” goal for England with a thumping header against the Germans, Upson was drafted in after so many defensive injuries. Looked brilliant one minute, and out of his depth the next, everyone expected him to depart from West Ham this Summer, but after those performances no buyer came forward.

Ashley Cole
Another Chelsea player, dogged with dodgy personal problems, Cole was a “dull highlight” in South Africa. According to the papers, Cole has been “relaxing” with some lovely looking ladies since England were dumped on their butts by ze Germans.

James Milner
Put in a Beckham-esque cross for Defoe to score against Slovenia, and did his best to cement himself on the right wing ahead of Aaron Lennon, Shaun Wright-Phillips, David Bentley, and Theo Walcott. Linked with a silly-money deal to go to Manchester City – but still at Villa for now.

Frank Lampard
“Scored” England’s 2nd goal against ze Germans, about the only thing he did all World Cup. Since then has been seen trying to talk Scott Parker into leaving West Ham, and buying flowers for his new WAG whose name I can’t remember, but she was on BBC1 and now left – apparently.

Gareth Barry
Somehow managed to make himself one of the first names on the England team sheet, and even was billed as the “saviour” after missing the first game against the USA. Now back with Manchester City and their 140 man squad, and expecting to be booed as the “saviour” tag is easily forgotten.

Steven Gerrard
Handed the captain’s armband after Rio was injured and Terry was shagging too many player’s ex-girlfriends, Gerrard started the World Cup with a goal and we all thought it could be our year. Sadly, that was the only highlight – and Gerrard failed to lift his players, as was as crap as the rest. Talks of him quitting Anfield (as every year) are now on hold (again) as Liverpool think they have new buyers (again).

Jermain Defoe
The mighty midget scored the winner against Slovenia, so he had to start against ze Germans, but lets face it, he’s always been very average in an England shirt. England’s forward line was pathetic, and Defoe was the only striker to score in the tournament, leaving him joint top scorer – on 1. Looking forward to Champions League with Spurs, if they get past the qualifier.

Wayne Pooney
The nation (for some reason) pinned their hopes on this one player – he was awful. Worse then awful. Since proving he is one of the world’s most over-rated players, he spent the rest of the summer on holiday, and photographed smoking and urinating outside a nightclub at 5am – says it all.

No doubt the overpaid players who claimed to be bored and homesick, tired and fed up with one another will play some excellent football in the Premier League this season, and we’ll all be left wondering why they were so crap in South Africa… again.

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